Feelings Present
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I’ve never been one for analysing feelings;
we didn’t have feelings in my day just responsibilities.

I think that, particularly as we get a little older,
we can easily get caught out by
assessing matters past through feelings present.

It seems that many of us use times of ill health
for reflection and contemplation over matters past
and maybe that’s not altogether wise
for it can, not only lull us into further depressive states
but can also help to alienate us from those around us,
particularly those more prone to sensitivity.

We couldn’t be sensitive in my day;
we had too many mouths to feed.

I did see her at the hospital on two occasions
but on the latter of these I was somehow
shocked to hear her new revelation.

She said that in her opinion, she now felt like
she’d just wasted the last forty years of her life.
Well how the hell was I to know that she had an opinion?
and I spent the remainder of the week in the kitchen
looking for the rest of it
instead of going and visiting her again.

We never really had much time for talking when she was alive
but it was just the way things were in them days.